Parenting is no picnic, although it can be at times. It’s hard work but also the most precious gift on earth. According to verywell.com, scientists have come up with four different parenting styles and the effects they have on children. Let’s find out what your parenting style is!
Authoritarian is a very intense parenting style. Many rules, all about obedience, and all about punishments. It’s the parent’s way or the highway. They hardly ever take the child’s feelings into consideration and they aren’t very warm or empathetic toward their children.
Authoritarian parents don’t leave room for any exceptions. Their children will follow their rules without explanation and that’s final. They don’t care to negotiate or reason with their children.
Authoritarian parents may use punishments instead of discipline. So rather than teaching a child how to make better choices, they’re often focused on making a child suffer for his or her mistakes. Their children may feel like they are never good enough.
Children of authoritarian parents tend to follow rules much of the time but unfortunately, develop self-esteem issues and may grow to be hostile or aggressive. These kids may also become good liars because they taught themselves how to lie their way out of punishments.
Authoritative parents care about their child’s well-being and make an effort to create a healthy balance of discipline for bad behavior and praise for good behavior. They value having a positive relationship with their child and offer guidance in their everyday life. They explain their reasons behind their rules so that their children understand them instead of resenting and fearing them. They try their hardest to always take their child’s feelings into consideration.
These types of parents establish clear rules but they also allow for reasonable exceptions to rules. They believe in using consequences that teach valuable lessons and help shape their children into good people. They use positive discipline to prevent behavior problems and to reinforce good behavior. They are usually all about reward systems to praise good behavior.
Children raised in an authoritative household turn out to be happy and successful. They are more likely to be good at making decisions and evaluating outcomes on their own. They are usually good in social situations and grow up to be hard working.
Researchers have found that kids who have authoritative parents usually become responsible adults who feel comfortable expressing their opinions.
Permissive parents are inconsistent and don’t stick to their word. They set rules but don’t enforce them. They don’t put effort into giving out consequences and they don’t interfere in their kid’s life very much. Permissive parents are lenient and have a hard being firm. They rarely give out consequences and when they do, they usually give into begging.
Permissive parents are a friend to their child, not a parent. They hang out with their kids and encourage them to talk to them but rarely discourage bad behavior and poor decisions.
Kids who grow up with permissive parents tend to struggle in school and might have a lower academic level than their classmates. They may also have behavioral issues because of the fact that they were never disciplined and they feel they can walk all over teachers like they do with their parents. They may also report sadness and are at a higher risk for health problems, like obesity, because permissive parents struggle to limit junk food intake and good habits. They have more cavities and higher cholesterol.
Uninvolved parenting is pretty much what it sounds like. They are very uninvolved in their child’s life and it may be intentional or unintentional based on mental illness or substance abuse. They don’t care to ask their child about their day or get involved with their homework or schoolwork. They don’t know where their child is half the time or who they’re with. They don’t set many rules or curfews. They don’t spend time with their children very much and are extremely hands-off.
Children of uninvolved parents basically raise themselves, so they become strangers to nurturing and discipline. They are neglected and their basic needs are often not met, which can be detrimental to them.
Parents are often uninvolved because of their lack of knowledge of child development. Taking parenting classes can help permissive parents learn the basics of good parenting. A parent might be uninvolved when they are overwhelmed with work, life, bills and other responsibilities.
When parents are uninvolved, children struggle with their self-esteem. They tend to perform poorly in school and exhibit frequent behavior problems. They also rank low in happiness and feel alone.
Which type of parent are you? You may not fit into one character or you may hold attributes of each type of parenting style.
“The studies are clear, however, that authoritative parenting is the best style. And there are always things you can do to become a more authoritative parent. “
Putting constant effort into building a positive relationship with your child and creating a healthy balance of discipline and positive praise can lead to being an outstanding parent. Over time, your child will reap the benefits of authoritative parenting.